By Jimmy Robertson
Many donors who contribute to the mission of the Virginia Tech Athletics Department do so for the purpose of positioning themselves for season ticket purchases. But if they realized it, they would be truly honored at how their financial resources get put to use.
A great example of that plays on Virginia Tech's volleyball team, where a funny, engaging, smart, and gifted player quite honestly might not have gone to college without that support.
Carol Raffety insists that she resembles every other Virginia Tech student-athlete. She attends classes daily. Goes to practices and gets sore after them. Enjoys naps. Scrolls through Instagram, occasionally posting. Hangs out with friends. Succeeds in her sport, as evidenced by her standing as one of the ACC's top liberos – she notched her 1,000th career dig last season.
But a deeper dive reveals so much more. Her story involves a painful tragedy, a brave mother, a close family, a bold decision, a willingness to persevere, and ultimately, undeniable success. Her story has earned her the respect of her teammates, who named her a team captain for this fall and the squad's de facto "heart and soul."
"I think she is in a lot of ways," Virginia Tech volleyball coach Jill Wilson agreed. "She embodies the work ethic and passion for this school and also has an appreciation for what being a part of this program and getting a degree means. Having all that is really important for one of our captains. We have more depth and more kids who are getting that same mentality – and she's been a big part of that."
DEALING WITH TRAGEDY
Raffety never knew him – the man who was her father, a husband to her mother, and a man who honorably served this country as a member of the Army. She really only knows of him through old photographs and what she gleans from family members. She keeps a photo of her and her sister with him at the beach as a constant reminder.
Michael Raffety took his life when Carol was 2 years old. He left behind wife Vanny and his two girls – Carol and her older sister, Maxine.
"He was bipolar," Carol said. "He had a lot of emotional problems. He hit a point in his life where he thought he was incapable, and he was depressed and couldn't be in the military. He left, and that's when it all took over his life. He had a rough childhood. Pills and alcohol got the best of him, and he committed suicide when I was 2 years old.
"I don't remember anything. My sister does. She was almost 6 when he passed away."
His death rocked the family, changing the trajectories of their lives forever. It particularly affected Vanny Raffety, then a stay-at-home mom who was forced to find a way to provide for her two girls.
The odds were stacked against her at the time. An immigrant from Cambodia, she settled in California and married Michael not long after turning 18. She met him while working at a local convenience store in Northern California, and he worked as a security guard at a nearby mall. That may strike some as random, but love rarely follows any script.
He enlisted, and the Army later shipped him to Oahu, Hawaii. He and Vanny had two daughters, both born in Honolulu.
They moved back to Novato, California – roughly 30 miles north of San Francisco – not long after Carol's birth. Five of Vanny's seven siblings live in California, and they provided comfort after Michael's death.
Still, Vanny knew she needed to pick up the pieces. She knew that her girls needed for her to pick up the pieces. That meant getting a job and building a future – for all three of them.
"When he was in the military, it was really only her, and then when he left, it was only her," Carol said. "She had to pick it up right away. She's the strongest woman I know. She had two kids on her own without her husband. She got a job and managed to keep us in California and in school. She's a great woman, a strong woman."
Vanny Raffety landed a job with State Farm, her place of employment now for the past 20-plus years. She raised her girls the right way, imparting her survival instincts upon them. Not that things were always easy – far from it, in fact.
One example came after Carol turned 4. Vanny went to the local school system and begged officials to let her enroll Carol into kindergarten. Her reason – she couldn't afford daycare. School officials acquiesced, so Carol went to school and attended an after-school program until her mom picked her up each day. Her early start is the reason why she enters her senior year at Tech at the age of only 20.
Both daughters became interested in volleyball, though Maxine gave up the sport, preferring more artistic hobbies – today, she works and attends a community college in pursuit of a career in art. Carol became immersed with the sport because of her sister and never lost that enthusiasm.
"When she was playing, I would shag [balls], and I would watch every single game," Carol said. "I begged my mom to put me on the court. I started when I was 9 years old, and I've been playing ever since. It's been like a big outlet for me. It's legit my only passion."
CROSS-COUNTRY CHOICE
Raffety played other sports growing up in Novato. She tried gymnastics, and attempts were made at basketball and soccer. But her idiosyncrasies led her in a different direction.
"I'm very competitive – very competitive – and I can't deal with the contact and being near somebody on the court, like, for basketball," she said. "I get too into it, where I can get too physical if someone is near me. With volleyball, there is always a net."
Raffety emerged as a talented player and starred both at Marin Catholic High School and on her club team. While on the club circuit, she attracted the attention of then-Virginia Tech coach Chris Riley.
Of course, coming to Virginia Tech would mean traveling 2,700 miles away from her mom and family. Initially during the recruiting process, she focused solely on West Coast schools.
Riley wanted her to take an unofficial visit, as many prospects do these days before making a college decision. But there was a problem – her mom couldn't afford to pay for that. NCAA rules prohibit schools from offsetting expenses for unofficial visits.
Her grandfather solved the dilemma, coming forward and paying for both the airfare and the hotel room. He also tagged along, not wanting Raffety, then 15, to make a cross-country venture by herself.
That trip impacted her more than she imagined.
"He was the one who walked me around this campus for the first time," Raffety said. "Seeing the smile on his face and me being as happy as I was really sealed the deal. Everything was amazing, all the support in all aspects. I couldn't have passed up any of that."
DRIVE FOR 25 BLITZ
(To participate in the Drive for 25 Blitz and support student-athletes like Carol Raffety and others as they perform at the highest level athletically, academically, and within the community, please click here and join the Drive for 25 today!)
She committed to Tech, but interestingly, her final two options came down to Columbia, an Ivy League school, and Tech – an odd combination, particularly for a California kid. Yet both presented the same road block of forcing her to leave home and her mom.
On her official visit to Tech in the fall of her senior season at Marin Catholic, Raffety brought her mom – NCAA rules allow schools to pay the expenses for an official visit. She needed her mom to validate a decision this big.
Like her daughter, Vanny Raffety fell in love with Virginia Tech.
"She was like, 'You have to come here,'" Carol said. "She loved it. Now she tries to come out one weekend when we play two volleyball games and there's a football game. She loved it when she came here, and she still does."
That reaffirmed Raffety's decision to accept a scholarship to Tech. The combination of the beauty of the campus, the academics, the ACC, and truthfully, the free education overrode everything else.
"I think it takes a lot of guts to travel that far away from your family when your family can't come here that often," Wilson said. "But Carol's got an inner strength."
In July of 2016, a month after her high school graduation and only 17 years old, she flew with her mom to Boston to visit with her aunts in Rhode Island. One of her aunts and her uncle then drove her and her mom to Blacksburg to move her into the dormitory. After moving her in and getting her settled, they said good-byes and departed for Rhode Island.
For the first time, Carol Raffety was alone.
"That was a really sad day," she said.
SUCCESS AT TECH
Raffety gradually immersed herself into college life, with time spent focusing on classes and volleyball. She worked her way into immediate playing time and broke the Tech freshman record for digs with 481 – a record that had lasted for more than a decade.
Yet she never took her focus away from her mom and still hasn't. She essentially checks in daily, either through a text or by calling. Absence has actually strengthened their bond.
"I was her whole world, and volleyball was her whole world," Raffety said. "My sister was growing up and doing her own thing, but she [her mom] had me, the baby. Once I took off, that's when she was like, 'What am I going to do?'
"I worried about her for a while. Now she's back home. I told her, 'This is the time to focus on you for the first time in your life. You've been carrying us on your back and shoulders for 20-plus years, so this is a good thing.' I was just reassuring her. She's happy now. It's all good."
Everything has turned out well for Raffety, too. A coaching change after her freshman season resulted in Wilson's arrival, and that created some uncertainty when looking toward the future. But Raffety credits Wilson for turning her into a more confident and stronger player, student, and woman.
That became evident when Raffety and former teammate Jaila Tolbert tried out for the U.S. National Team in Colorado Springs, Colorado in February. She hesitated to accept the invitation, but at Wilson's encouragement, she attended the tryout and earned a spot as an alternate among the 213 athletes who tried out for the squad.
"I felt it would be an empowering experience for her to go play with the best of the best and realize that she belongs with them," Wilson said. "But I had to let her make that decision and take some time with her family to talk about it. I was really proud that she went and became an alternate. That's a big deal. Of course, she was crushed about it – she's so competitive and strong willed. I kept telling her, 'No, this is huge. They only pick a couple. You were right behind them. This is great.'"
THE FUTURE
As for her current squad, Raffety continues to play her role in the Hokies' quest to rise up the ACC's pecking order. One of four seniors on the squad, she hopes to lead Tech to an NCAA Championship appearance in her final season.
"There is no doubt we can make this a big year," she said.
A sense of finality has started entering into Raffety's thoughts – her final season, her final match, her graduation with a degree in criminology, and others. Her future holds promise on and off the court, as she contemplates volleyball and a potential career in some form of law enforcement.
Her mom plans on returning to Blacksburg this fall to watch her play, cheering and agonizing over every point. Of course, she plans to return in the spring for the university's commencement ceremony.
It's during times like these, though, when Carol thinks about her father. She thinks about what he missed and what she missed.
"I think about him during the big things," she said. "Those big things, I definitely think about him and what it would be like to have him see me in person. It would be life changing. Day to day, I think about mom, but my dad, yes, of course, the big things. I would love it if he could see it all – and that's sad. That's the sad part, but I know he's watching, and that's how I have to take it."
That's a mature answer for a young woman who has overcome a difficult part of her past. Ask her and she thanks Virginia Tech for helping with that – its resources, the coaching staff, her teammates, students, fans.
And of course, donors, too. They may not realize it and may never will, but their investment in her certainly has paid off.
